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The Magical Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

10/24/2014

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One topic that has always interested me was the notion of self-fulfilling prophecy. Robert Merton, a 20th century sociologist, actually coined the term of self-fulfilling prophecy in his 1949 book Social Theory and Social Structure. The prophecy or prediction is false but is made true by a person’s actions. Today the prophecy is viewed as neither true nor false but merely a statement that alters a person’s actions and therefore comes true.

Ask yourself this: Are happy and successful people that way because good things happen to them? Or, do good things happen to them because they look for and have feelings of happiness and success? I see this play out everyday with my clients.

Someone who says, “I will never be very strong,” chooses to work in a group of athletes who uses weight much lighter than he can handle and therefore never improves his strength.

Someone who says, “I am just not flexible,” spends little-to-no time stretching and mobilizing after class. When they do receive instruction on how to improve their flexibility, they rush through the movements and half-ass them.

Those who think everyone is out to get them and that they are being treated differently or unfairly look for instances to prove this true and even open the door to this happening. Their negative actions cause, in return, negative reactions toward them from those nearby.

Or, on a more positive note, someone who wants a chance to prove himself in high school athletics works hard and pushes himself even though there are no promises made to him that he will make it. Hard work and perseverance pay off and the stars align and he becomes valuable player on the team.

These are all true stories and people I know and work with every day. Which of these people is more enjoyable to be around? Which are leading happy and fulfilling lives? Control your own destiny. Which prophecy will you choose?

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nothing remains constant

10/21/2014

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As soon as a milestone is passed, it’s significance fades, and the focus is shifted to some other marker further down the road. No matter what you do or how satisfying it is in that beautiful moment in time, immediately you want more. You have to, if you want to find out how good you can be. You HAVE to look at goals as the most significant, beautiful, wonderful things in the world to obtain, and when they are attained, curtail the joy in short order, and again look forward and begin to build the desire in your heart for another destination on the horizon. Sometimes it seems crazy to always look to what your fingers cannot quite touch, to not let yourself be satisfied, never rest, never allow complete happiness with what is. Seems like a crazy way to live.

On the other hand, I believe I would go insane without it. If my quest, my dreams, even my own white whale to chase was replaced with a mindless 9 to 5, white picket fence, sit-coms in the evening and nothing more to bitch about than taxes and the neighbors, they probably would have to strap me down and start the medication.

In the words of the great Waylon Jennings, I’ve always been crazy, but it’s kept me from going insane.



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It’s a marathon, not a sprint

10/17/2014

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It’s all so fast paced today. It’s common to expect overnight turnaround on everything. Our microwaves heat up food within seconds. Our washing machines wash and dry within minutes. Our smart phones give us access to messages in milliseconds. And Facebook provides us information about everything about everyone we don’t really care about every second of every minute of everyday.

So it’s natural for us to expect things to be done quickly and this is absolutely fine. That’s what technology is meant to do – make life convenient, efficient, better, easier and, most importantly, faster.

But when we expect physiology to match technology, we have a problem.

You see, today, everyone wants to go to bed drowsy from a dozen donuts but wake up with washboard abs. And this in all probability includes you at some level. Quick results are what you’re after. You don’t care for patience anymore. You’re all about the results.

You don’t have the patience to focus on the process anymore. It’s all about what the process results in. You don’t really about the journey anymore. You’re too busy obsessing about results, you don’t take the time to enjoy the journey.

But let me know ask you this – What’s the hurry? What are you rushing towards? Why this insatiable desire to lose as much weight in as little time as possible?

It is this desperation that makes you vulnerable – vulnerable to food manufacturers who scam you into believing their food will let you have the cake and eat it too, vulnerable to pseudo-fitness gurus and gyms/fitness centers who promise you results that are too good to be true and vulnerable to a side of yourself that is always tempting you with shortcuts.

So what’s the deal then? Focus on slow gradual results over a period of time? Absolutely! And here’s why.

Firstly, any and all of your efforts towards fat loss and health are meant to be done for a long time. 3 months? No. 6? No. It’s more like for the rest of your life. In other words, it doesn’t matter how long it takes you to lose those pounds that you so desperately want to lose because if you don’t keep those pounds off you’re back to square one!

One way or the other you are going to have to keep doing what you did to get there, for the rest of your life. Let’s say you ate well and exercised consistently and lost a significant amount of weight and are now at a place where you are happy with yourself. If you choose to stop and go back to living like you did earlier, you will end up going to looking and feeling like you did earlier. No doubt about that.

The only way to consistently and sustainably stay in shape and/or in good health is to make long lasting sustainable changes to your habits – physical, nutritional, physiological and social.

With that being the case, let me ask you again, what’s the hurry? What are you rushing towards?

Realize, it’s not a sprint. It’s a marathon and a hard one at that. The better you pace yourself, the more you learn about yourself, the better you plan your life, the more sustainable your results will be. 
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What You Truly Want

10/2/2014

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Picture
It’s probably the number one excuse that anyone uses for anything…
You see, the truth of the matter is that when something is important enough to us, when it has real value in our lives, we make time for it.

Please don’t tell me that you don’t have time to shop for and cook healthy meals in order to remain on the proper dietary track for your fitness goals. Please don’t tell me that you can’t make it to the gym, or a gym (which could very well be your living room, garage, or basement). And please don’t tell me that you don’t have time to stretch or work on mobility.

Let’s just call a spade a spade: it’s just not that important to you.

If it’s important, you’ll find a way to make it happen.Case closed. 
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